California Dog Eats Baby Whole

Dog Okay, Report Concerned Parents

-Hollywood Hills, California (Rueters)

Early Saturday morning, a German Shepherd belonging to Norm and Frieda Lay of Hollywood Hills, California, ate the couple’s nine month old son, Chip, apparently swallowing the infant whole.

Initial reports filed with the Los Angeles Police Department indicate the incident occurred between 3 and 6 a.m. Saturday morning, when the dog, affectionately called “Gerbils” by the Lays, managed to jump into the child’s crib. The dog then ate the child whole, as x-rays have since confirmed.

After a brief visit to a local veterinarian, Gerbils was pronounced healthy, and the Lays urged to allow the dog to rest for a few days before resuming his normal activities.

When called for comments, the obviously distraught Frieda Lay had the following to say:

“We cannot begin to express how concerned we were when found Gerbils in the baby’s crib, and saw that the baby was missing. Our first thought was, ‘Oh my God, Gerbils ate the baby. Is Gerbils going to be okay? Is he going to get sick?’ But the doctors have informed us that, thanks to some miracle of God, Gerbils should be up and about in no time.”

Added Lay, “We can always have another child, but nothing can replace that dog. Nothing.”

This incident is the most recent in a long line of similar episodes between dogs and children. Just last month, a pit bull attacked eight ten year olds at a birthday party outside of Des Moines, Iowa. And while four of the children died, two entered a coma, and two required amputations, the dog was uninjured and released by the veterinarian after a few days of observation.

According to Dr. Gary Horvath, Dean of the University of Pennsylvania School of Veterinary Medicine, it is always essential to pay careful attention to the dog’s health after a child-consuming event.

“Dogs are very sensitive to what kind of flesh they consume, and the fact is that they are particularly sensitive to that of human children. Any time a dog manages to attack or eat a child and survive the incidentas in this caseit is certainly an extraordinary occurrence. We should all be counting our blessings.”

9 Responses to “California Dog Eats Baby Whole”

  1. Beth Says:

    These people’s dog ate their kid and all they are worried about is if the dog is going to be alright. Some people don’t deserve to have kids!

  2. Patrice Owens Says:

    This is in-humane!!!!!! I had to read it twice to make sure i was actually understanding that this infant was consumed by a dog and the parents are not even the least bit concerned about the newborn..”O my God, Gerbils ate the baby, is Gerbils going to be okay?” WTF maybe this baby is really better off w/o these animals!

  3. Matt Says:

    This must be fake.

  4. oudeis23 Says:

    Sorry, but this is sadly true.

  5. Lauren&Ashley Says:

    WTF….. Is this a joke or are these people really that effed up to worry about the dogs health after it ate their effing kid. wtf id wrong with people and why arent the cops questionsing anything these people say… seriously they were okay with their dog eating their baby…. does anyone think they should have more? HELL NO!!!!!!! Straight fucked up. kthanks.

  6. Samantha Says:

    fawk pepp’z get worse mahn i would’a juss toke dat Dog to tha reserve and shot tha fawk’n mutt….if i were to meet these fawkers id slap dem both of em pepp’z have no momorial’s..

  7. Peter Says:

    This is obviously fake.. note how the child is always refereed to as “baby” as if it didn’t even have a name.

  8. anita Says:

    its very fake c’mon pay attention the mothers name is Frieda Lay sounds very similar to frito lay as in the chip snack company lol

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